Keith Olberman and Miss California’s boobies

So, I see that Carrie Prejean was on all three morning shows this morning, defending her outrage against photographers who photographed her boobies again and again and released those photos not knowing that Miss Prejean was going to use her new breast implants to sell an antigay political message.

Here’s Keith Olberman with his new WTF!? moment

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I’m convinced that Miss Prejean kept her position in the Donald Trump organization primarily on her skills sucking various parts of Donald Trump’s anatomy.

Fire & Brimstone

Look, I could be wrong about this, but somehow, I just don’t think that this guy is preaching that old tyime religion…

Twittering in Church, With the Pastor’s Encouragement

fire_and_brimstoneLast year, Voelz, a pastor, was tweeting at a conference outside Nashville about ways to make the church experience more creative — ways to “make it not suck” — when suddenly it hit him: Twitter. (The TIME 100: Ashton Kutcher on “The Twitter Guys”)

Voelz and David McDonald, the other senior pastor at Westwinds Community Church in Jackson, Mich., spent two weeks educating their congregation about Twitter, the microblogging site that challenges users to communicate in 140 characters or less. They held training sessions where congregants brought in their laptops, iPhones and Blackberrys. They upped the bandwidth in the auditorium. (Finding God on YouTube)

I tried reading this article, but I was having aa hard time trying to get past the concept of folks dicking around in church with this electronic toy and trying to con me into thinking that it is something akin to praying?

I can’t call down the 10 plagues fast enough.

The Perfessor

…And Death Rained from the Sky

air_force_one_manhattanWell, no, not really, but you can’t blame us for freaking out. Yesterday, in New York, the populace apparently totally freaked out when they spotted a low-flying 747 being trailed by an F-16 Fighter jet in the sky over not only the Statue of Liberty, but Ground Zero as well.

Well, as it turns out, it was something of a misguided “photo op” by the White House (mostly because they somehow “forgot” to inform the Mayor’s office that they were barnstorming Midtown just to take some really cool pics.

Fun guys, eh?

Well, just because — over here at Cuppacafe East, we’ve been drinking heavily since just before dawn, we thought that we’d present to you this story, from a slightly more — shall we say — askew viewpoint, Take it away, Jon…

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart M – Th 11p / 10c
Mistakes on a Plane
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Economic Crisis Political Humor

Now all I need to make this day complet is news of a pandemic virus…

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart M – Th 11p / 10c
Snoutbreak ’09 – The Last 100 Days
Daily Show
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Economic Crisis Political Humor

Would someone please remind me not to ask for stuff any more.

The Perfessor

Shake that Baby now (or not!)

As you are probably aware by now, roughly grabbing and violently shaking your tiny infant is probably not going to be the best idea you have on that particular day, for (so we are told) this tends to crash their tiny brains into the insides of their little craniums. Resulting in, well their immanent demise.

However, in the virtual world of digital violence, we know that all sorts of splatter-punk destruction is acceptable, so everything from shooting brain-eating zombies, to running over jaywalkers and pedestrians in your Gran Torino, or whatever (anyone got a cuppa Joe?).

Therefore, it should come as no surprise that in recent days iPhone users were (briefly) able to download a virtual baby shaking app that allowed said users to take their frustrations out on those selfish, self-centered babies by, well, shaking them to death.

No, I’m not kidding.

(No babies were shaken in the taking of this photo.)
(No babies were shaken in the taking of this photo.)

There may be plenty of seemingly useless iPhone apps for sale (iBeer, anyone?), but Apple’s vetting process for approving new applications from developers came under scrutiny in the case of a 99-cent app called Baby Shaker that simulated the shaking of an infant.

The game was developed by a company called Sikalosoft, and featured illustrations of a baby whose eyes would become covered in red Xs when the iPhone is shaken vigorously, and featured the tag line: “On a plane, on the bus, in a theater. Babies are everywhere you don’t want them to be! They’re always distracting you from preparing for that big presentation at work with their incessant crying. Before Baby Shaker there was nothing you could do about it. See how long you can endure his or her adorable cries before you just have to find a way to quiet the baby down!”

As you can expect, there were some bleeding heart liberals that objected to this frivolity so, Apple was forced to issue an apology. On Thursday, the company issued a statement saying that the application, “Should not have been approved for distribution.” The spokesperson then went on to say, “We sincerely apologize for this mistake.”

Not sure what is going on in the head of some of these app designers, but perhaps someone will develop an app for that.

The Perfessor

Stupid is as Stupid does…

Apparently while here in CT we have zoo animals running around as pets attacking people, in Berlin women actually go to the Zoo so that they can get mauled by wild animals. This past Friday afternoon, at the Berlin Zoo, A woman climbed over a fence and jumped into the habitat of a Polar Bear during feeding time.

One adult polar bit her several times after she plunged into the moat, police said.

Zoo workers tossed rescue rings toward the woman to hoist her out and distract polar bears swimming nearby, said Goerg Gebhard, a Berlin police officer.

At one point the woman fell back into the water and was grabbed by a bear before she was eventually hoisted to safety.

Yeah, she was pretty effin stupid. It’s unclear why the woman entered the bear habitat, but police issued her a citation for trespassing.

Read all about it.

The Perfessor