Oh what a weekend…

If you saw my last post, you saw a little bit about my weekend, but apparently there were other things going on as well, first up the Obama administration is sending Lawyers into the BP/Gulf situation. While I say it’s about time, I’m still, not sure if stuffing the pipe with lawyers is going to plug it up any better than stuffing it with golf balls. (Unavoidable aside, what do you call 100 lawyers at bottom of the Gulf of Mexico…a good start!).

Walt sent me a link to the camera feed that is cutting the pipe so that they can seal it off and re-route the flow of oil into a tanker (apparently I can’t hot-link it, but if you cut out the link (mms://a261.l9789246260.c97892.g.lm.akamaistream.net/D/261/97892/v0001/reflector:46260), paste it in your windows media player Open File URL, you will get to see a live feed). Walt says there is a site that does allow fro a hotlink, but he had to go to work, sio I’m guessing that he’ll post it later.

Oh yeah, and there was apparently a sinkhole that abruptly opened up in Guatemala. Yeah, you heard that right, a sinkhole (that looks eerily like something the Silver Surfer did in FF #2 or the Predators did in AVP #1, or even the Horta from the original Star Trek TV show.

So I’m figuring the end of the world is a tad sooner than the Mayans would have had us believe…Me? I’m preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse.

The Perfessor

Random bits

A while back I told you that I acquired a (free) pound of coffee from Dunkin’ Donuts by donating a pint of my blood to the American Red Cross, well, I picked up the coffee (finally) and added it to my stash of ready-to-be-ground coffee beans.

This pint puts me on the plus-side of 15 gallons that I’ve donated. I try to go every two months, and by now, know most of the nurses at the donation center where I usually donate.

On an entirely different matter, I know that tomorrow is Superbowl Sunday, but just the other day I (finally) received a special Union Mets pin of the new Shea…er Citi Field. No, I’m not in a union, but my brother, Ron, is, (abnd is a HUGE Mets fan), and he pointed me in the direction of the pin (which was free for the asking).

Well, I requested the pin back during baseball season, and just received it.

Cool, eh?

Well, I’m off to run some errands with the ball and…er…wifie, so I’ll be back later.

The Perfessor

Cuppa Bits (Perfessor Style)

coffee_mugWell, today is going to be one of those scatter-shot days. I’m running around, and I came up with a few interesting (and fun) things that I thought might interest you all.

I can see it now, a new law that requires cars to lock our hands on the wheel and keep out head pointed facing forward at all times.

What am I talking about? Well, this, for starters…

A female Driver who was apparently painting her nails at the time (yes, while driving!) crashed into, and killed a a female motorcyclist.

A northwest suburban woman was thrown from her motorcycle and killed Saturday evening after a female motorist — allegedly painting her fingernails at the time of the crash — failed to stop at a red light and slammed into the bike, authorities said.

The incident happened about 5:30 p.m. Saturday in a southbound lane of Route 12 at Old McHenry Road in an unincorporated area near Lake Zurich, according to Lake County Sheriff’s police Sgt. Scott Morrison.

You see, the Keller said the woman driving the car told the police that she was painting her fingernails and did not notice the light was red. So I’m guessing that it was the fault of whoever pout the light there in the first place, as well as whoever determined the timing sequence for the light itself.


Well, here is yet anouther reason NOT to do drugs (as if you actually needed another reason). Apparently they make you not just stupid, but, well, incredibly stupid.

… a man called the police at 12:40 a.m., “asking them to arrest another man because he had given the man $150 to buy cocaine, but the seller never handed over the drugs.”

It seems that because possession of small amounts of Pot have been decriminalized in Mass the caller had been smoking (perhaps a tad too much) too much pot, and simply forgot that the decriminalization didn’t extend to the cocaine that he was purchasing.


Here is where life imitates art, in a scene that was (apparently) swiped from the film The World According to Garp. A woman bit off her lover’s penis in a car crash.

A boss and his secretary who were having an affair saw their romantic tryst interrupted in a wince-inducing manner – after a car crash led her to accidentally bite his penis off.

You see, according to the reports in China Press and Sin Chew Daily, the 30-year-old woman was performing oral sex on her boss in a parked car in a Singapore Park, when the car they were in was struck by a van that was backing up.


Yeah, that last one hurt me too.

The Perfessor

Cuppa Bits — Perfessor Style!

Yeah, yeah, I know that it is Walt who usually posts these random bits of silliness here, but he’s apparently out getting drilled and I just had so many things come across my virtual desk today that I had to jump into the fray:

First up, 100 day in: Want to know why we measure a Presidency by his first 100 days? me too, so I looked it up. Apparently, Fair or not, the first 100 days of all new presidents are compared to those of FDR.

Setting priorities for his first term in 1933 was easy for President Franklin D. Roosevelt. He had to save America from economic ruin. He had to at least begin to pull us out of our Great Depression. He did, and he did it during his “first hundred days.”


You Swine!: I just learned that they discovered the “Patient Zero” for the Swine Flu.

Pucker up!
Pucker up!


You Swine! Part Duce: Anyone out there got Gene Wilder’s number? (Tell me you’ve seen Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex * But Were Afraid to Ask). I’m not entirely sure what to make of this, but, well, here it is…

She oinks, snuffles in a trough and has a fetching set of trotters.

But it’s not just her tail that’s curly.

Elizabeth the pig wears a golden fleece that could pull the wool over enough eyes to make her the pride of the flock.

Do you want me now?
Do you want me now?

OK, the image has been photoshopped, but it wasn’t me. I swear! It was this guy.


Rocks in his box!: Yep that’s what this Florida teen found when he opened his new Nintendo DS (that he bouthg from Wal-Mart).

Florida teen finds rocks in Nintendo DS box: According to WTSP-TV, the confused teen opened up his gift only to find bunch of stones and a rolled up Chinese newspaper in place of the popular handheld.

Rock(s) your Box
Rock(s) your Box
When his mom contacted Wal-Mart they initially said it wasn’t their problem,and sent the woman to Sony, which also told her to pound sand with a rake. Needless to say, Wal-Mart ultimately blinked, and gave the woman a working DS. Apparently they learned that the same box of rocks had been previously returned by another disgruntled customer.

The story goes on to say that earlier this month, a PSP system bought at a different Wal-Mart store in Florida was found to contain a memory stick filled with pornographic images. (Personally I’m not certain I would have returned that one.)


I’ve got my eye on you!
I’ve got my eye on you!
One for the Gipper!: Almost forgot this one. It is for Walt. I read this in a recent Entertainment Weekly. The book Laura Rider’s Masterpiece (Jane Hamilton) is a book where the protagonist — an aspiring romance writer — stops having sex with her husband, then arranges for him to have a mistress so she and observe and write about the affair.

Sound like anyone we know?





Well, I’m done for today, especially as I’ve got a bottle of tequila and a six-pack of Iron City chillin’ here in the fridge. So I’ll move on to whatever is next and come back for more tomorrow.

Ciao y’all!

The Perfessor

Cuppabits November 18th

First, to celebrate my son’s birthday (see previous post)
an article that he would appreciate. During his high-school years, Mike worked at a computer gaming parlor, but one that had a side business of reading old tapes for oil companies. It seems that the oil companies would store their geologic data on archival tape. Most of it was seismic lines. The tapes survived the test of time for the most part, but the machines that put the data on the tape? Not so much. Mike’s company had those tape players and Mike knows how to get the data off of the tapes and into a usable format.

Well, it turns out that NASA is on the lookout for a working tape player as well. It seems that some of the data beamed back from the Apollo missions was recorded on special tape players and then the tape…

was lost. Well, not lost actually. It was misplaced before it was archived. Thrown in a dumpster perhaps? Nope. Just hidden under the floorboards of a theater.

The tape player needed to play the tapes back is about the size of a refrigerator, and there happens to be one in the Computer Museum in Australia, where the tapes were originally made


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When ya gotta go, there’s a place out back

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Sometimes you feel like a nut
Sometimes you don’t

I had January 7th in the pool of “When does Lindsey Lohan decide she wants a penis again?” and I was so wrong. It was November 16th.

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Republican ghost writers must be chomping at the bit to write Sarah Palin’s memoirs after reports started filtering in of the estimated 7 Million Dollars advance on the manuscript. I use the word estimates, because there’s no official word, and this is just reading the entrails from the publishers and booksellers I slice open every other week…

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Graphic novels don’t make the New York Times Bestseller lists, much to the chagrin of comic book publishers and cool paranormal mystery writers.

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Where staying AWAY from the Dr. made this woman lighter.

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Folks around the Houston area simply didn’t get their electric meter read during the time when the hurricane came through and the company was working on getting power restored. Last month’s bills were a generous estimate, but now the meters are read, there’s a huge sticker shock. [Chron.com]

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Am I the only person in America that enjoys watching the American version of LIFE ON MARS more than the original English version?

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Update on Blogging RanchoCali — The well spud date got pushed back by ten days or so because of insurance issues. I hope to have an additional update later in the week.

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Finally, all those comic book based movies. Here’s a list of 75 comic book based movies coming to a theater near you.

You’ll note that T.H.U.N.D.E.R. AGENTS is not one of them. There’s a reason for that. And I won’t tell the tale. yet.

Home Stretch Presidential Politics

As we move into the last couple or three weeks of presidential politics, the candidates are coming into the home stretch. If they can’t make their case now, they never will. It is for all the marbles this time.

Needless to say, as the candidates keep stressing (or in some cases, McCain changing) their messages the comedic possibilities of what is being said, have become downright hilarious.

First up, is my old pal, Jon Stewart talks a little bit of the potential danger in whipping up an audience into a mob:

He then went on to comment on McCain’s “New” Stump speech…

Still, while it is all fun and games, there is tonight’s debate (zzzzzzzzz). Yeah, if you are starting to snooze over the concept of yet another debate (that doesn’t involve that cute Palin gal winkin’ at us). So if you want to enliven the debate, I suggest one of these 20 ways.

Still, the best I’ve seen of late is this website that gives us a clear picture of what Sara Palin as President will truly look like.

“I fear for the Republic.”
“I fear for the Republic.”

Hopefully if it actually happens, I will laugh as hard.

Just to be sure, it isn’t all fun and games, as political pundit Keith Olbermann points out:

And finally, yes, Sara you have foreign policy experience because you can see Russia from your porch, but then again (according to you) New Hampshire is apparently part of the “Great Northwest.”

Me, I’m going back to drinking heavy and blowin’ up stuff.

The Perfessor


This just in from The Times-Tribune apparently the Secret Service is taking its job seriously, and investigating threats emanating from the crowd at a Palin rally:

The U.S. Secret Service is investigating a threatening remark directed at Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama during a political event in Scranton.

Apparently, a hateful remark came from the crowd while congressional candidate Chris Hackett was addressing the crowd at the Riverfront Sports Complex. (Someone shouted “Kill him!” after a mention of Obama’s name. The story went on to indicate that there was no indication that Hackett or Palin — who took the stage a half-hour later — actually heard the remark (They are Republicans, it isn’t in their job descriptions to actually LISTEN to the electorate).

Read the full story, here.

The Perfessor (again)